Marriage Guidelines

Saint Patrick Parish

Marriage Guidelines

WEDDINGS AT SAINT PATRICK PARISH

The celebration of the Sacrament of Marriage is of the greatest importance to the members of our parish family. As a community of faith, we share the joy of engaged couples, their families, and friends. The members of our staff are eager to do everything possible to see to it that our parishioners’ weddings are deeply joyful experiences of faith and love. This guide outlines our parish’s wedding procedures and policies. All inquiries about marriage should be directed to our parish office.

Preparation

Registered parishioners who wish to be married at St. Patrick’s meet with a priest or deacon at least six months before the wedding date. During the months before the wedding, the priest or deacon assists the couple in preparing for marriage. Normally, this preparation includes several meetings with the priest or deacon and participation in a marriage preparation program organized by married couples.

Reservation of the church building

Before scheduling a wedding at St. Patrick’s, every engaged couple must first meet with one of the parish’s priests or deacons. Absolutely no information about the availability of church facilities may be given to a couple by the parish staff before the couple’s initial meeting with the priest or deacon. At the initial meeting, the priest or deacon learns about the couple’s personal backgrounds, and discusses with them their freedom to marry in the Catholic Church.

If either the bride or the groom has at any time contracted marriage in the Catholic Church, or gone through any form of marriage outside the Catholic Church, this information must be discussed with the priest or deacon at the initial meeting.

Once the couple’s freedom to marry has been confirmed by the priest or deacon, the church building may be reserved for the wedding. Our parish’s busy liturgical schedule limits the times that the church building is available for weddings. Most weekday afternoons and evenings are available. On Saturdays, weddings may be scheduled from 10:00 a.m. through 2:00 p.m., and from 5:30 p.m. on. Our parish’s liturgical schedule cannot accommodate any weddings on Sundays.

After the church building is reserved for the wedding, it may also be reserved for the wedding rehearsal, which is usually held the evening before the wedding. The rehearsal may be scheduled with the priest or deacon, or with Mrs. Beverly Ouellette, in our parish office. As our parish’s wedding coordinator, Mrs. Ouellette conducts all wedding rehearsals and is present at all weddings. Because we have many weddings and wedding rehearsals at St. Patrick’s, couples are encouraged to reserve the time for their rehearsals as soon as possible.

Because we have so many activities in our church building, it is important that wedding rehearsals and weddings begin and end on time. Couples should be sure to remind all the members of their wedding parties to arrive on time for the rehearsal and the wedding!

Sacramental records

After the wedding has been scheduled with the priest or deacon, the engaged couple contacts the parishes at which they were baptized and/or confirmed, to obtain the records of those sacraments. When requesting baptismal certificates from Catholic parishes, the couple should be sure to request “the long form for marriage, with notations.” Sacramental records must be mailed from the parish directly to the priest or deacon at St. Patrick’s – not to the couple. For men and women who were baptized or confirmed at St. Patrick’s, we have those sacramental records in our archives.

Mass/Ceremony

A marriage between two Catholics is normally celebrated within a Mass. If a couple has questions about this, they discuss them with the priest or deacon.

For a marriage between a Catholic and a non-Catholic, the couple discusses with the priest or deacon whether it is more appropriate to celebrate the wedding with or without a Mass.

Planning the liturgy

The priest or deacon assists the engaged couple in planning their wedding liturgy. The couple is offered resources for considering and choosing the various elements of the liturgy (readings, prayers, blessings, etc). The priest or deacon also discusses with the couple the inclusion of family and friends as participants in the liturgy (lectors, gift bearers, Extraordinary Ministers of Holy Communion, etc.).

Visiting clergy

Visiting Catholic clergy are welcome to celebrate weddings at St. Patrick’s. Non-Catholic clergy are welcome to participate in weddings at St. Patrick’s. If a couple wishes to include visiting clergy in their weddings, they should discuss that possibility with the priest or deacon at their initial meeting. Clergy from outside Massachusetts are responsible for registering with the Secretary of State of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts prior to the wedding.

Liturgical setting

The engaged couple should discuss with the priest or deacon any special decorations they would like to use in the church building during the wedding.

Flowers that are placed in the church for weddings are traditionally left in the church afterwards, to enhance the beauty of other parish liturgies.

Some couples wish to include “unity candles” as part of their wedding liturgy. Please note that the use of unity candles is not a necessary part of the wedding liturgy. If a couple wishes to include unity candles, they may obtain them from commercial suppliers, or may use the parish’s set.

We discourage the use of runners at weddings at Saint Patrick’s. Our church is quite long and beautifully tiled. Most often, runners slip, tear, or become tangled when they are used in our church. If a couple chooses to use a runner, it may be obtained from a florist. The length of the main aisle is 100 feet.

Nothing – including rice, confetti, birdseed, or flowers – may be thrown in the church or at the entrances of the church. These present a real danger for people’s slipping on our tiled floor and steep steps.

Couples are welcome to have their receiving lines in the vestibule of the church building, after the conclusion of the wedding liturgy.

Music

Music for all weddings at St. Patrick’s is planned in consultation with Mrs. Patricia Romeo, our Music Director. The engaged couple meets personally with Mrs. Romeo to plan the music for their wedding. This meeting is arranged as soon as the priest or deacon has reserved the church building for the wedding.

Visiting Musicians

Subject to the approval of Mrs. Romeo, visiting professional church musicians may participate in weddings at St. Patrick’s. Couples should not make any arrangements with other musicians until they have met with Mrs. Romeo and have received her approval.

Photography

The wedding liturgy is a wonderful time of prayer and rejoicing. To avoid photographers’ intruding upon this sacred reality, some restrictions are observed.

Photographers may not enter the sanctuary of the church.

Photographers should not interfere with the entrance procession or recessional, nor interfere in the flow of any liturgical action.

Only the lighting already available in the church may be used. No additional lighting may be brought into the church.

Flash photography is discouraged. If a photographer wishes to use flashes, he or she should speak with the priest or deacon before the wedding to clarify how extensively flashes will be used.

Offering/fee

At the couple’s initial meeting with the priest or deacon, they will be given a brochure that includes information about the offering made to the parish at the time of marriage and the fee for Mrs. Romeo.

Civil license

All couples married in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts must obtain a civil marriage license. Couples are responsible for obtaining this from a city or town hall, and presenting the license to the priest or deacon two weeks before the date of their wedding. Without a civil marriage license, no wedding can take place at St. Patrick’s.

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